Oh, Canada!

Dear Canada,
I'd like to offer you a deal. The 'blue' states in the union will join
Canada for protection from the 'red' ones. You see, if you let us Bluies join Canada the benefits you would enjoy would be enormous! Think of it! You'd get the fashion and financial capital of North America, New York City; you'd get a LOT more shoreline around the Great Lakes; an extensive Pacific Coast including sunny
California; the home of great pizza the Cubs, Chicago; and a tropical vacation spot in Hawaii just to name a few. You'd rake in on the monuments alone; Golden Gate Bridge, the Statue of Liberty, Paul Bunyan Land, the Sears Tower, the new Freedom Towers, BOTH sides of Niagara Falls!, eh?!!? How's that sound? I know you want it. You just have to ask, and it's all yours. So I ask you to consider my plea. I've enclosed a proposed map as a visual aid.

Thank you for your time,
A Nervous and Concerned US Citizen